Waiting for someone to prove me wrong

"I write about love and such, maybe because i want it so much" - Brandon Heath

 I feel that may be why I write about love a lot because I want it so much, but then again I wouldn't quite take it that far. Being shallow could be one of the most saddest traits to inquire, and i am guilty. If you aren't good looking, wealthy, and don't drive a fabulous car or big fucking truck good luck with getting my attention. I have no clue why i am shallow, i wasn't raised that way at all. Most guys i have dated had a fling with or whatever you would like to call it, are your typical Douche bags. I didn't really care, i was ignorant and of coarse i always give them the benefit of the doubt that they wont be just another guy. They did not break my heart, they did not make me cry, and they did not make me crazy, in fact i knew it wouldn't last. I just liked the thought more than i actually liked the person. They all have had one thing in common, well of coarse, besides their guppy dicks, they all proved me right. For once i would just like to be proven wrong. I would like a guy who could make me laugh, who didn't care what anyone thought of him or me, who i could hang out with and be good friends with out that awkward moment where they try to make the move on me. I want someone to care, to sleep in my bed without actually"sleeping" with me and a kiss on the cheek with every goodbye. But you do have to have that bad boy charisma to keep me hooked. Any girl wants this, but i seem to be the only one out of all my friends who just hasn't found it. I thought i reeeeaaly did at one time. He was unlike anyone i have ever met before. He had a brain, a laugh that made me laugh, and unfortunately a shitty car.. which i came to love. I became ignorant to every single thing with him. I thought it was a little shady at first, how could someone be this nice, this caring, and interested in me out of all the prettier girls out there? He kept on proving me wrong. As i became good friends with all of his good friends i was introduced to the other side of this one of a kind. I refused to believe it. More and more i was looking like a complete idiot. Being that i actually liked the guy and not just the thought of him, i knew my feelings were vulnerable as ever, and i was not about to get hurt again. Every time i wanted to break it off, i got the "we have something special, unique, blah blah blah "shit from him.. so of coarse i didn't want to let a good thing go. So i continued to fall for this selfish bastard. At the end of this ongoing, annoying, whatever they call this relationship, i realised, yes indeed he was your typical guy. I would have totally been understanding if he told me "Hey, your hot but I'm busy fucking butter faces, so I'm sorry I ignored all your drunk calls the entire time you liked me." A guy who can tell the truth and say sorry(perfect). Jesus how hard is that. I would probably have more respect for you than i have for an undercover, dick head, rodeo cop(little to none). Hooking up with girls, being a complete ass hole to everyone, and selfish to the bone.. i should have stuck with my shallow ways. I am proven right once again. Moral of the story, people can put up a good act, but the show has to end sometime right? We remain good friends, but never again will I give a guy more chances than needed to prove me wrong. I mean unless you do drive a truck, and or are extremely good looking ;)


Note to self: Stay away from tall, witty, baseball players... they are bound to having their dick in at least two other ignorant gals.

-ash